"gotta be fuckin kidding me," i observed adroitly. my window open to the december night, the fan blowing, all the blankets kicked onto the floor and still i'm lying in a puddle of sweat.
the next morning i texted bob my landlord to ask who held the reins on the thermostat, and if he could ask them to kill the noise a little bit from midnight to 6am. he replied that the thermostat was at the top of the stairs and to feel free to set it as i chose.
"cool !" i opined cleverly to my empty living room.
the next night i woke up to the same thing, went up to lower the thermostat, and discovered this:
sorry for the blurry picture. it says, "please DO NOT TURN DOWN the thermostat. Have it set at 72 degrees. Thanks."
well that's fucking weird, i sharply consider. i still turn it down to 72 from the 85 it's set at (no exaggeration !) and head back to bed.
the next night, the same thing. i turn it back down to 72. the following morning i text bob again to ask if he had left the note to not lower it past 72, and if he was aware the shit was getting set to 85 by one of the people in the building. i got spit on my face from the spluttering in his text response, which further assured me that i could set the thermostat where i liked, even if it was below 72. he also said he thought he knew who left the note (i didn't) and said he'd talk to them.
"alright, dope." i deftly note.
so last night, i go upstairs to run the now-routine of turning down the thermostat, and am greeted with this:
i splutter at the fucking nerve of someone anonymously dictating what i am to not even think about doing ?! and crank that sumbitch down into the 50s. then this morning i wrote a response letter:
text:
dear anonymous note writer
your claims to comfort are no more valid than mine. also, acting like you're getting packed into a boxcar and shipped to siberia when someone turns the thermostat down from EIGHTY FUCKING DEGREES is at least a little bit disingenuous and melodramatic.
being as you've not left a name/apt#/ph# to discuss this matter in person where we could reach a mutually satisfactory conclusion in an adult manner, i instead contacted bob, who told me to set the thermostat wherever i chose. given that he's the landlord and has authority over the house while your authority extends to the edge of your imagination and not a step further, i went with what he said. if you have any problem with that i suggest you "don't even THINK about" writing another passive aggressive note because i will just ignore that one too. instead maybe contact bob.
yours in poverty,
i hope to update this thread further in the near future !
My best friend lived underneath some one like this. Fortunately for you, your not as big a pussy as he is when it comes to neighbors.
